these are a few of my favorite things

this weekend has been a whirlwind of emotions for me....all over the place, i feel as if i have experienced every emotion known to man, tonight, i sit awake listening to christmas music through the television and staring at the blinking lights on my christmas tree and i started reflecting on things that truly make me happy in my life and thought perhaps sharing them might make me feel some better, so bear with me

listening to christmas music, especially the old stuff, makes me remember my childhood and how i was allowed to sleep by the tree and listen to records and how i would stage elaborate dance routines that to me reflected the stories i heard on the songs.

giving gifts, i am a much better giver than a receiver of gifts, to me it makes me smile to be able to give someone that one thing that they have wanted, or to give someone who isn't expecting anything a bit of happiness, i take great care in my selections and pray and think about each person while i shop.

leading a group of two and three year olds in singing "jingle, jingle, happy bells" in the church pagent, it is a tradition and even though this year i was singing solo it made me smile to remember how much joy this song brings to so many people who have heard it sung for 40 some years.

eating pancakes with my daughter at denny's in the middle of the night, and getting to the heart of what is on her mind and how she feels about life, and just laughing about silly things, added bonus when we go in p.j.'s.

decorating my christmas tree, i go all out, including the ever dreaded tinsel strands, it is not elegant and matching like so many trees i see, there is no theme to it, but i love it more and more each year, the kids are really into, i have bought them an ornament each year since they were born and they are very territorial about hanging their own ornaments.

seeing lights on homes as i am out and about, it is a simple thing yet to me it is so breathtakingly beautiful, it seems pure and inviting and especially in the fog when it looks kind of hazy or in the rain when it twinkles just a bit more, it is like prozac to me.

no school, no homework, enough said.

watching old rankin bass christmas shows, i own them all on vhs and most on dvd, favorite is year without a santa claus, because of heat miser and snow miser, it just cracks me up, i also have a soft spot in my heart for the grinch and for a disney one called small one.

fires in my stove, the heat and glow make me so warm and i feel safe, not scared or cold.

the traditions i have established with my kids, i have left a legacy that they can continue or abandon but they will never forget.

friends and spending more time with them, laughing, playing games, eating, smoking, drinking, seeing movies, shopping, all of it, time is precious to me and being with people i love and trust means the world to me.

reading the christmas story and remembering why we get this time of year to spend with loved ones, thinking about how mary felt as a mother and everything going wrong on the night she gave birth, remembering that this time of year i was always safe and knowing who it was that made it that way, i always feel closest to god this time of year.

ok, i feel a little better, not great but a little more relaxed and able to hopefully get some sleep, i have had a rough go of it this week, please take care of yourselves and the ones you love this season, please take time to reflect on what makes you happiest, and please know i am thinking of you all with fondness in my heart. much love and gratitude to have you in my life! Merry Christmas!