humanity i love you

Humanity i love you because you
are perpetually putting the secret of
life in your pants and forgetting
it's there and sitting down

--e.e. cummings

There is this site I love to read.
Because it's about people, and how they are.
Funny, disgusting, sad, clueless, brilliant, vulgar, ridiculous, lonely, and endearing.
It isn't all that clean or whatever, but it is real.

It's called Overheard in New York. And that's pretty self-explanatory. Here are some of my favorites:

Teen girl #1: We're not going to KFC! Their food is, like, poison.
Teen girl #2: Yeah, they kill their chickens alive.

--96th & Lexington

Woman #1: Don't you hate taking the train so early in the morning? I take it every day.
Woman #2: Could you not talk to me?

--A train

Waiter: How would you like your eggs?
Guy: Can I get two eggs scrambled, one sunny side up?
Waiter: Um...I...Um...I don't...
Guy: Whatever. Give me three scrambled eggs. God.

--Ben Ash Delicatessen, 7th Avenue

Guy #1: Yo, what's the Louisiana Purchase?
Guy #2: You mad dumb, yo. That's when they illegally sold all that alcohol.

--St. Francis College, Brooklyn Heights

Guy: I could become a sheriff. Don't you have to take a test to become a sheriff? What if you have one of those disorders that you throw up whenever you take a test?
Girl: Well I guess you could get a note or something.
Guy: Oh yeah, you could be like, "I threw up on my test, that's why it smells funny. Here's a note."

--F train