my wonderful friends

i didn't want to go to our weekly tuesday night gathering. i will admit, i was scared and a little hurt that it wasn't going to be just a prayer time. i felt vulnerable and anxious about the coming week. i had a rough day with roofers overheard. my whole day was rearranged and not by my wishes. so, when it came time to go, i hesitated, did i really want to go. no, i can honestly say, i was cold and tired and just a tad cranky, but i felt drawn, and so i went. and then i kept wanting to leave, but felt as if i were tethered to the place. it didn't feel safe, it was loud, and fast paced, and new faces and i was cold and tired. looking back, i can say that i am grateful that i stayed. i learned a lot about myself, and my friends. i learned a lot about what is important to me, and what i do that is important to others. i found myself with a newfound respect for the people who have come into my life and become my friends. i found a niche and felt comfortable and safe, and cared for. it's nice to have friends, good true loyal friends, with no agenda but to hang with you. nothing is expected of me, nothing is asked of me, people smile and make me feel warm inside, even though i am cold and tired. i learn so much about life and love from these wonderful people i call friends.