"God's got my back"

Today between classes I got a call from the mother of a child I love. We have a long history, this child and his siblings, their mom, and I. She has turned her life over to Jesus, overcome meth and alcohol addiction, and has changed her life completely. Her kids, however, who were raised in utter chaos and deprivation, still struggle.

Today she told me that this boy I love is back in juvenile hall. For possession of a 38. That would be a snub nose .38 caliber revolver. He is 14.

He got it on the street from a friend. His probation officer found it in his room on a random search.

He was incarcerated a few months ago, and every time I visited him he swore to me (over numerous rounds of card games in which he throttled me) that he would never go back into the hall.

My first reaction to this news was panic. I sank down on a bench and held back tears and fear and tried very hard to be a comfort to my friend. But as it turns out she was the one who comforted me.

She assured me that God is in control. "I had just told Him the day before, 'God, I give you my son. Do what you want with him.' And then this happened. I trust Him. God's got my back, Jamie."

She told me their home had been broken into a few weeks ago. All the 'things' she has worked hard these past four years to attain were taken. Her son had become depressed after it happened. I know--from what I have learned--that depression is usually suppressed anger.

He got the gun to protect his family.

Think about it. You are 14. For the first 10 years of your life there was never enough food, and your house was a filthy mess with furniture disappearing when the need for drugs became more important. Your mom--whom you love and who is your only parent--was violent, passed out, or gone most of the time. Your home never felt safe.

Then things changed.

Your mother became healthier. Food and furniture became reliable. Your home was transformed into a place that felt good, safe, full of promise.

Then someone came into that home and threatened it. You are afraid it might all be taken away. You've seen the violent nature of adults in your life. You know what they are capable of. You have no faith in the police--most of the time they arrive too late and nothing is redeemed or recovered. In fact, the police have usually been there to take people you love from you, not save you from anything.

Somehow keeping a gun in my room doesn't seem like that crazy of an idea anymore.

My young friend has a court date and we don't know what will happen. I ask you to pray for him, and for the Holy Spirit to remind him that though the world is ugly and hard and sometimes very cruel, his mother's words are true: God has his back. And His arms are open wide.