a desire of my heart...?

Had a board meeting last night. Um...yeah. Everybody has parts of their job they don't like, right? And God finds little ways to let me know He is there with me... a hand rubbing my back, a wink across the table, an encouraging word in my ear... And I know that He is moving in hearts, using the ministry to the deprived and needy to shed religiousness and fear in the administration who don't know that they, too, are deprived and needy. He gently and slowly draws His children closer to Him. I know all this. But still.

And occasionally I am privileged to see a heart change. And often my own faith is tested. And I come home and look at my husband, and he knows how it was. And after a little while I remember that it's not me, Lord, who I am in You and who we are together--it's my job... the work You have given me and the battle You have placed me in. And I remember it is a desire of my heart, and You put that there, too, Lord.

And the next morning I get up and am very glad to be going to the mountains with my husband, where there are no phones, email, text messages, or board members. And I know I will come back refreshed and ready to step back into my post, this wonderful, crazy, trying, frightening, exciting, draining, miraculous mission I am blessed to be a part of.